Start with this question: Am I the best, best friend in the entire world? Am I that same best friend for myself?
A great place to start looking is at the people you attract to yourself. What kind of people are they? Do you love and admire them, or do they piss you off more often than not?
Are you the friend and ally to yourself you want others to be?
I know I haven’t always been the best I can be to myself or to others. I screw up sometimes, big time. I see those screw ups reflected in the petty annoyances that follow, the odd people that appear and the volume of my inner bully voice as it attacks my inner victim. This continues until my inner guru calls a change of play and we get back on the path that is more authentic to us.
It is often said in many ways that you cannot give what you do not have. If you are not being your own best friend and doing what is right in the name of highest and best for you, it is pretty stinking hard to truly and authentically give that to others.
The list below is offered as a “get your energies flowing” list to see how you can improve your relationship with you. Use these as a starting point and adapt to make your own list and live by!
- Create regular time for yourself. Have a playdate with yourself. Become the child you were when you played to have fun with just you. If you are like most of us, time for you takes a back seat to everyone else. But if you cannot do this for you, you never fully recharge your energies and are giving from a place of lack.
- Personal Care. You tune up your car, clean your home – do the same for your body. Schedule the doctor or dentist appointment you have put off, spend a few hours in the bathroom to spruce or go big with a full day spa retreat. These are not just maintenance items, they are opportunities to connect with your physical, mental and spiritual bodies and invite growth.
- Eat Well. Learn about, if you don’t already know, what is best for you and then put the best quality foods and drinks into your body. Give your body the fuel it needs to operate at maximum efficiency. Pay attention to the crap that goes in and how much different it feels when you put good stuff in!
- Move. Physical movement increases happiness and can support a longer life. To spend the longest possible time with your best friend and ally, move. Let your physical system support you for as long as it can. Notice the high you feel after you have gotten up and moved around in comparison with the lethargy and lack of energy you have when you just sit there.
- Feed Your Soul. Socialize with people you care about, develop a spiritual practice, become part of a community, meditate, let fear take a backseat, use your strengths every single day. Your soul is the crux of who you are, what are you doing with it? Your soul is the key factor in how attractive or unattractive you are.
- Live Your Purpose. Similar to number 5, examine your “why am I here?” Sit in contemplation of your vision for your life and then ruthlessly make decisions that support living that life. You get way more interesting and animated when you have a vision for the future. You will be able to excite yourself and draw others that share that vision.
- Live within your means. Get your finances in order, know where your money is coming from and flowing to and have a plan that you live by. Be conscious of where this resource is flowing and feel secure enough to say yes or no when the situation warrants. Money and all that it buys isn’t happiness, it is simple tool to support a lifestyle you want and that lifestyle is possible.
- Honesty. Say what you mean and mean what you say both out loud and in your head. Be rigorously honest in thought, word and deed for yourself and with others. You know when you are being fake and it feels gross doesn’t it?
- Laugh. Every day single day of your life, every hour if you dare, laugh with abandon and joy. Connect with playful energy of laughter and have fun. Think of how contagious laughter is! It is way more fun to spread than criticism, gossip and bitching.
- Learn More. Always seek to learn more. Take classes, read, have debate, explore museums, take trips. Seek to learn more about the world around you and be informed. Educate yourself to allow new perspective, expanded awareness and open-mindedness. Think of the fuel for your soul, the stories to share, the inspiration to provide as you experience more and more of all this world has to offer. It is a pretty big amazing world we live in, go for it!
That is my list!
Feel free to use it or create your own list of attributes for the best friend and ally you want and decide – am I this person today? How can I draw closer to embodying that energy more fully?
Let Your Inner Guru Guide You: What will you do? What would you add to this list to make it your own? Spend 10 minutes and describe your ideal friend. Compare yourself to your description and then make adjustments where you want to move closer to that ideal.
Have you grabbed your free Inner Guru Guide yet? You can find it on my website at www.nolimitslife.guru