The usual expression is “Lesson Learned, I’ll never do that again!” You have likely said it right? Think about the energy behind that – it is stop energy. It’s about what you don’t want to do instead of focusing on what you do want to do! And if you run around constantly telling yourself what you don’t want to do, it’s kind negative right?
So what if…just maybe… you focused that energy on creating the next movement. If you said “Lesson learned! Here is the opportunity I created as a result” It feels different right? A little more open, a little more forward moving, a little more positive.
I found myself shifting this paradigm as I thought about some of my experiences over the last few years – to be honest a little unconsciously at first. The message was showing up and I was acting on it long before I realized what was actually happening, (way to be awake and conscious me! Sarcasm and eye roll implied).
Since I was a child I had been exposed to groups of people collaborating to serve others in a higher purpose kind of way: in my parents metaphysical community, living in a small town, as I joined ROTC and later in the Military, as a member of a church and then full circle to a metaphysical environment of my own. In each instance I learned lessons:
- The Lesson: Spirituality is a lifestyle, not a label. I have learned not to trust when I hear someone saying something and then see them do something different.
The Opportunity: Be patient and observe actions, and ensure my actions meet my intentions.
- The Lesson: People make up groups who support ideals and sometimes people suck. When the agenda of an individual is at odds with the agenda of the group, conflict happens; especially when that person is pushing theirs pretty hard, or in a super passive aggressive, undermining way.
The Opportunity: Obtain a clear understanding of the group focus and ensure it aligns with my personal ideals, or challenges them in a way I am willing to grow in that moment.
- The Lesson: Trust the first impression people make on you. I remember attending my very first meeting for a group I was joining to do something big and immediately perceiving the anointed leader was not actually willing to be the leader the idea needed to grow to full potential. Long story short, My intuitive hit was more accurate than not.
The Opportunity: Follow through with intuitive responses to situations.
- The Lesson: Money is an element in most groups – and it needs to be dealt with openly and honestly. Resist it or not, money is a part of the society we live in and operate with. In a situation where you have more than one individual involved, if there is any perceived misuse or secreting of money issues, resentment can arise.
The Opportunity: Always be clear on matters of money where it affects a group larger than me.
- The Lesson: A leadership and management philosophy must be agreed on by the group. Whether there are formal leaders/managers or not, it doesn’t matter. But who the decision makers are and how they decision make and who gets to have input, matters. Generically I have observed this in a variety of atmospheres where there is a “community” who was to work together and contribute on all things…but anything that didn’t agree with the “leader’s” personal philosophy became an issue. Collaboration is tough when there is public statement of community and a private sentiment of “it’s all mine”.
The Opportunity: Be clear on leadership and management philosophy and be impeccable with my word with respect to implementation.
Using just the lesson energy from above, I could very easily resign myself to never working with a community again – to never collaborate with another group of individuals ever again. Yep, I could easily lone wolf it, and probably be fairly happy and decently successful.
Yet, there was a philosophy I couldn’t turn my back on:
I don’t think we always do our best work alone. I think we thrive in a community, whether it is formal or informal. This community hosts all kinds of energies that help you individually and collectively grow. As I thought about this philosophy I wholeheartedly endorse, I reflected on another set of lessons learned – this time around my first year of business as a coach (which does overlap with a few of the above mentioned lessons – not attempting to confuse you!).
It was a tough decision to leave the “security” of my corporate job and leap into the unknown arena of building my coaching business. I had very little in place when I did that and I spent a long period of time (and it continues), building, creating, making mistakes and redirecting myself and stumbling and falling and succeeding and over hills and valleys of all sorts! Phew.
It was not easy. And in the middle of it I got divorced, my son started kindergarten, I moved, and realized the “friends” I had were really good when my life was a “mess”, but not so good when I started to get “better”. And as I thought about how I could influence and support others, I realized I could help people through that first year by forming a community for aspiring providers to work in as they created their own path into being a coach, healer, creator or spiritual adviser of any sort.
It all synched up last fall as I furiously filled up a yellow legal pad on the sidelines of a soccer practice. I couldn’t stop writing as the structure, the flow, the ideas, the concepts and design of a business model to support aspiring coaches healers and artists emerged and alongside the idea that this could also work for the same group who struggled with the “business” side of their business. To prove I wasn’t nutty I reached out to a diverse group for feedback and was met with a “Please do this!” kind of response.
It took the combination of 1) being willing to acknowledge that I still held on to the ideal the people could work together on a common goal, 2) the knowledge that I was better with people than without and 3) discovery that lessons learned didn’t have to be full of stop energy, for me to realize that I had stopped looking at lessons learned as things to never do again, and started looking at them as opportunities to help and serve based on these lessons.
In November and December of 2015 I began pulling together a group of service providers to work on the No Limits staff for 2016. I give them mentoring, an infrastructure to work under complete with the necessary tools to run their business and marketing and client attraction support. Alongside that they receive training , event coordination, speaking engagement booking and more. In return, they pay me a commission based on the clients we enroll. We defeated the idea that starting up is super expensive and can’t be done. My intent was to destroy that excuse for not following your dream.
Going forward I will still see clients myself, but I was also be recruiting for my amazing staff of coaches who are aligned with the same philosophy I have: there are no limits to what you can do in this life time; Release Limits, Embrace Life. The synergy in the group of people who were attracted to this model, my work and their potential is awe inspiring and as I introduce them, you’ll be nodding in agreement!
In forming this collaborative group of professionals, I did my very best to translate the experiences I had in other groups in a positive way and focusing on collective success, individual success and a clear line of authority and structure. It is about supporting not only the No Limits Staff, but the community that forms around us, to fulfill their callings, conquer their inhibitions and truly step into their own authenticity.
So if this philosophy sounds like something you want to give a try, join the energy! We invite you to join follow us on all the social media we cultivate: Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, Linkedin, tumbl, Twitter . Keep a lookout for groups that will be forming virtually and locally where you can connect even further with this energy.
Learn more about Coach and Artist Jennifer Murphy and the No Limits Team at http://www.nolimitslife.guru