Advice for Aspiring Coaches

Life Coaching. It attracts people as a profession.

And for good reason.

There are a lot of us out there wondering if we are doing it right.  We question how we can be better. We seek self-help support and we attend classes and events like Leslie Knope seeks waffles (Parks and Rec Reference – watch it if you haven’t, it’s awesome and hilarious).

We are told we offer great advice and people constantly come to us for our wisdom and support.

We think, “I should get paid for this.” When we look at how it’s possible, the easiest path appears to be Life Coaching:

  • Becoming a licensed counselor of any sort requires schooling and there are tons of restrictions.
  • Writing a book feels super hard for reasons from the physical writing to the finding a publisher to the dubious path of self-publishing and rejection.
  • As we cast about for an option, Life Coaching shows up, because it is truly an open field = literally anyone can name themselves a life coach and so it is.

I get approached on this A LOT.  A. LOT.  Emails, coffees, “Quick questions” and clients interested.  Some are interested in how I did it so they can do it too.  I share the same advice over and over, it makes sense to share it here.

Some Facts about the Industry

In 2016 the International Coaches Federation published a Global Coaching Study.  This study shared a few facts like:

  • More than 53,000 Life coaches are working today
  • The average hourly rate for a life coach exceeds $200 and coaches earn an average $51,000 per year
  • 99% had some sort of coach specific training and 81% received accredited training to become certified as a coach

I encourage you to read this brief on the study which shares the highlights.

You can download additional information and/or purchase the full study here .

I share these specific facts because it is easy, super easy, to get caught up on the idea that glamorous lifestyle and coaching are synonymous.  We aren’t all Tony Robbins or Martha Beck.  We aren’t all taking monthly trips to Bali for “retreat” and it isn’t raining $1000s in our living room.  That, my friends, is amazing marketing by business coaches.  It is tough to achieve in 30 days, or even 1 year.  It does take work.

Yes. It is possible to create a successful career as a life coach.

Here is a great satirical look at this phenomenon…good for a giggle ( I LOVE JP Sears work, seriously check out his videos, super awesome):

 

Six Pieces of Advice

Here is the advice I give to people who ask me about being a life coach:

  1. Research:  Put all your questions into the search engine of your choosing and see what kind of answers spew out. You definitely need to read more than just this post – there are tons of experts out there with more than tons of opinions, information caches and expertise to offer.
  2. Ask and Answer these Questions: Why DO I want to be a Life Coach?  What kinds of Problems do I want to solve?
  3. Visit the ICF website and consume all you can about the industry.
  4. Identify how comfortable you are with marketing and sales – you will have to do this as a life coach.
  5. Talk to those closest to you in your life and see what they say.  Take their questions or concerns and research them further.  Figure out how you can make this work – and if you still want to.
  6. Once you have done all of that: engage a life coach.

This last one may seem self-serving.  It’s not.  Having a life coach gives you the exposure to what it feels like to be a client – you need to be a client. Your coach can help you make sense of all the things you researched and discovered in steps 1-5, organize your plan of action and help you move through the process of transforming from where you are to where you want to go.  I won’t advise someone on coaching unless they are willing to be a client themselves.

What?  I need a Coach?

Just like an athlete is coached to improve time, speed, accuracy, strength, skill.  A life coach can help you navigate your improvements to confidence, clarity, and decision making while offering support and accountability.

It is quite possible that even if after spending the time researching all you can, you still have reservations.  A life coach can help you work through those to get the answers right for you.  Life Coaching may not be the answer to your career or calling question.  But following this path can help you discover what is.

A great book to read in this area of calling and sticking to things is Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance by Angela Duckworth. I love everything she has to say about goal setting, purpose finding, and sticking with things. I recommend grabbing a copy and a highlighter and get to reading.

The First Conversation with an Aspiring Coach

I love helping people answer this question of “How do I become a life coach?”.  I love it. And I will tell you, the conversation usually starts out like this:

Me:  Soooo tell me why you want to be a life coach!

You (ubiquitous form): 

“I love people and they are always coming to me for advice and telling me I give such good input.”

OR

“I want a job that pays me well and provides tons of freedom. I love helping people so this made sense.”

OR

“I want to help other people do something they love. My life is kind of a mess right now and if I can start a job I love then I think it’ll straighten out and I can help other people do the same”

And my Favorite – this is the answer I want more than anything:

“I want to work with people to realize what they are capable of and help them get it in a specific area of their life.”

This last person is clear on what they are looking for in seeking coaching as a career.  The previous 3 answers aren’t horrible entry points because they all possess a sincere desire to figure out how to help someone live optimally. An awesome starting position and in many cases help is only needed in getting specific.

These answers create different starting points into becoming a life coach:

  • You may need to do some work in your life first.
  • You may need to do some work getting clear on what you want to do and how.
  • You may need to clarify your own vision.

Being a Good Listener isn’t All there is to Being a Life Coach

Wait. Whaaaaaaaaaaat?

Giving advice is very little of what we do – we are here to help others discover their strengths and what optimal living looks like for them.  That isn’t advice based on our personal experience, it is expertise based on research, experience and training.

Yes, you must be able to listen.  Then you translate what you have heard into insight for the client – actionable insight: a question, an observation, a clarifying point to validate.  You guide them through self-discovery exercises and exploratory experiences.  The focus is 100% on what the client can discover through the lens you can share with them.

You must be able to set ego aside and be fully present – this may be the first time this person has ever been truly heard.  It’s life changing.

Again, another giggle worthy take on this: Shit Life Coaches Say

It’s funny, cuz it’s true.

Your Next Steps

If you are ready to do your research on this as a career, follow the 5 steps I outlined above then contact a coach.  I’d be happy to do a free 1-hour session with you to follow up on your learning and help you find a coach whether it is me or someone in my network based on what you want to do.

We may also find you are a good fit for my Coach’s Collective Membership Group where we explore coaching from multiple dimensions and share expertise among professional coaches across the globe.

Email at jennifer@nolimitslife.guru and we will get something set up.

And in case you haven’t yet caught on, I do view coaching a serious business.  These are people’s lives. And yet…life is funny.  Look for the giggle worthy.

Best of luck on your exploration!

P.S.  You may have noticed I didn’t talk about business plans, technology, websites, blog presence or networking.  I advise getting clear inside on what you want and how, first.  Once you get clear, you’ll be able to whip that stuff out much easier. Your web designer will thank you.

 

 

 

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Jennifer Murphy – Certified Personal and Executive Coach

I am a certified personal and executive coach ruthlessly focused on helping people live awesome lives.  I spent a large chunk of my life pursuing other people’s ideas of success and while those experiences were sublime in some cases, they weren’t the “more” I was seeking and I just never felt full. In 2011, I made the commitment to live life on my terms and everything changed. The life I love today was created.

My background is 10 years in the US Army as an officer, 10 years in Corporate America and then the last 6 running my own business. I have deployed twice in combat scenarios, worked with foreign governments and militaries and worked extensively in international business.  I have an undergraduate in Criminology, an MBA and certification in Positive Psychology. I have led organizations from 3-400 and love developing people and helping them create their next steps in life and work. 

I am founder of No Limits Life Empowerment Institute as well we a working glass artist, Reiki Master,  Partner in Shaman Grocer in Iowa City, and Co-founder of the Midwest Reiki Festival.    My favorite time is spent doing anything soccer related with my aspiring world cup soccer player, 10 year old Alexander.  I am also a pretty big fan of gaming (PS4) with my partner Craig while solving the world’s social problems. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

How Self Coaching Works

Warning: I use the F word in this post.  If that offends you…either ignore it or quit reading now.

I’m going to give you a peek at what self-coaching looks like.  My goal is that every client I work with can employ this after working with me as the first line of offense when their optimal life is threatened.

Here is me, right now:

Some days fucking suck.

That’s not really what I mean.

What I mean is there are days I must look a whole hell of a lot harder for the upside than others.  I always find it because I want to.  I really want to believe in the best aspects of this world we live in.  I think it’s possible we live in a world where people can be super chill and respect each other and act on their beliefs.

I see a fuckton (yes it’s a word) of bullshit around me.  And through that lens of optimism I choose how I handle my engagement with that.

Received some crap from my kid’s soccer club yesterday that really set me off.  The background is that my son chose to screw around for the last year or so and not engage at his very best in his sport of choice.   Simultaneously, the club decided to institute an “A” and “B” team philosophy for the U11 age group.

I’m all in on competition.  Seriously – give me a challenge and I will prove how ridiculous your skepticism at my abilities is. I was less than thrilled at the prospect of my son at 10 being potentially told he wasn’t good enough for the A team.  We talked mental strategy and physical commitment and he went for it.  He was assigned to the B team.

Devastation. Tears. Confusion.  Questioning.

And he was pretty upset too.

Through his tears he asked me what he did wrong.  How the fuck am I supposed to answer that?

We connected with his coach who had some encouraging and constructive words for him and we developed a mindset strategy for moving past this.  We also talked application of that strategy in a series of upcoming practices, a tournament he was participating in and the multiple soccer camps he requested for this summer.

(I am currently selling body parts to finance all of this. Anyone need a pinky finger?)

He played.  He played like I haven’t seen him play in a while. His fire was back. Go figure…my kid needed a challenge to get him fired up and re-engaged.  He had been bored. I get that and I can work with it.

I’m feeling good about all of this.

Then yesterday I get the rosters for the teams for the fall in his age group.  His team doesn’t have a full roster and doesn’t even have enough to field a team.  Exactly how is this supposed to work?  Parents are jumping to conclusions all over the place.  I am sitting back and choosing my engagement.  Parents are now cancelling their commitments.  They are pulling their kids.

Holy cow.

Should I?  Nope, not my way. I don’t do things simply because others are.

I wait to see how the club director will respond.  I am disappointed.  There is no plan shared.  In fact, we are told that the rosters were created without a plan.  That they are working on one after their break and will share it at the parent meeting in 2.5 weeks.

Not good enough.  Not good enough by even a little bit.

What now?  How do I coach myself through this?  Well, I start with looking at what is true here:

  1. My kid earned the spot.
  2. The club director doesn’t have a plan, though he promises one.
  3. My kid loves, loves this sport. He committed to growing through this situation.

The values I am using to filter this:

  • Authenticity
  • Honesty
  • Commitment
  • Passion
  • Freedom
  • Transformation
  • Growth
  • Professionalism

What skeptical, cynical me thinks:

This is complete bullshit, find a new club.

This lack of communication means there was no plan and now they’ve been caught so they are scrambling.

What you allow will continue.

Intuitive me says:

He will thrive in a new environment

Yes, he earned that spot, but he also deserves more from himself and from his support system.

Questions still lingering:

What would a move to a new club (assuming I can find a roster spot) do for him – what message would it send?

Will the plan be good enough?

Actions I will take:

  1. Be direct with my response to the club director. I expect more. He needs to know that.
  2. Investigate other options for him to play if the plan isn’t satisfactory.
  3. Discuss with his father.
  4. Consult with his coach.
  5. Love and support him no matter what.

If you have a near term threat to your optimal lifestyle, take it through those analysis steps (the ones in bold).  Consider what actions you need to take to resolve it. These threats aren’t always immediately contained.  Sometimes they take a bit of work.  Working through them using your authentic, best self is way better than just reacting. 

Coach yourself.  And if coaching yourself doesn’t work, get a coach. And hey…I’m a coach, you could apply for a lackluster to limitless session with me and we’d see if it’s a good fit by working through what’s on your near-term threat list.

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I am a certified personal and executive coach ruthlessly focused on helping people live awesome lives.  I spent a large chunk of my life pursuing other people’s ideas of success and while those experiences were sublime in some cases, they weren’t the “more” I was seeking and I just never felt full. In 2011, I made the commitment to live life on my terms and everything changed. The life I love today was created.

My background is 10 years in the US Army as an officer, 10 years in Corporate America and then the last 6 running my own business. I have deployed twice in combat scenarios, worked with foreign governments and military and worked extensively in international business.  I have an undergraduate in Criminology, an MBA and certification in Positive Psychology. I have led organizations from 3-400 and love developing people and helping them create their next steps in life and work. 

I am founder of No Limits Life Empowerment Institute as well we a working glass artist, Reiki Master,  Partner in Shaman Grocer in Iowa City, and Co-founder of the Midwest Reiki Festival.    My favorite time is spent doing anything soccer related with my aspiring world cup soccer player, 10 year old Alexander.  I am also a pretty big fan of gaming (PS4) with my partner Craig while solving the world’s social problems. 

 

 

 

 

When I Grow Up….

By age 30 I had ended one career and started another and still didn’t know what I wanted to be when I grew up.  I thought success was finding a career path that provided relatively good income and room to move up – one already laid out with simple steps to move through – like a board game. I was discovering life hadn’t laid those steps out as neatly as I thought and it didn’t feel as successful as I thought it would.

Up until age 30, things had been appearing and I had been saying yes to them – somewhat blindly.  In 1992 I went to college because it was the next natural step to living a prosperous life.  In 1995, the US Army ROTC office at CSU Fresno called and offered me a full scholarship to complete my education and I said yes – with little thought.  I commissioned active duty and went off to be an Army officer.  I didn’t have a grand plan on what that would look like, but turned out to be pretty good at it.  I consistently did well and got great assignments as a result.

When I decided to leave, it was because I was getting the first rumblings from within: life was more than just a job.  I wanted a lifestyle different than the Army was providing.  In a bid to retain me, I was offered the opportunity to work with the most elite support command in the Army…still I had to go. The voice within was getting louder.

I went to a job fair and accepted a job in the Midwest with a utility company.  I joke that I accepted it in a fever induced haze – the product of contracting bronchitis while on a whirlwind interview tour across the US and being unable to go to any additional interviews.  My dogs and I moved to Iowa in February 2004 and I soon wondered when I’d be leaving.

It turned out it was here I’d settle on what I wanted to be when I grew up.  I’d discover life didn’t have to keep happening to me, I could create my life. I could develop a vision for the future and put it into action one step at a time.  Others were out walking their paths, sometimes lined up single file one after the other doing the same thing.  But me, I wanted to forge my way through on my own path.

I had this same mentality as a kid: I grew up in the Sierra Nevada Mountains.  My backyard was literally the Sierra National Forest.  One of my favorite things was to follow a trail for a bit, then strike out on my own – see what might be just beyond sight from the established path.  I often trekked up and down the creek behind our house finding new ways to get to different vantage points and finding fresh perspective.

This mindset came back to me as I began to question the path I was following others on after the birth of my son.  In 2007 he arrived 3 months prematurely and I was gifted time as I cared for him while he finished his development in the incubator in the NICU. I had time to consider my life.

I realized I needed a new vantage.  I needed to explore some alternate paths.  I needed fresh perspective on who I was and what I was doing.

I took some courses.  I read some new books.  I dabbled in different things.

For too long. I got seriously restless.

Then I got serious.  I hired a coach.

Hiring a coach gave me the path to clarity, accountability and commitment.  It also confirmed, yes, my life is more than my job.  I am here to live a full, rich, passion filled life and the routine to retirement gig wasn’t cutting it.

Are you asking, “what do I want to do with my life?” and taking free course or download after free course or download and not finding answers? A coach may be your answer.

If you are signing on for e-courses and not finishing them – you aren’t alone. I recently read upwards of 97% of people don’t finish them. (that fact isn’t verified, but I could see how it can be true).

Are you bored with life, or busy with bullshit?  Are you doing things that kinda suck? Are you doing them out of some sort of obligation anyway? You may need support to say yes to things that rock.

Hiring a coach gave me the courage to confront what I was really looking for in life and the confidence to take some action toward it. Now, 7 years later, I still have a coach.  My coaches have changed focus and people over the years, but I will always value coaching support and perspective.

If you know you are capable of more but feel restricted by external forces, a coach can help you develop the skills, attitudes and behaviors you need to free yourself.

And hey, I am a coach.  I might be able to help you like I have helped many others find the freedom they want – the freedom to be and live the way that really crave. It’d be super cool to have a conversation with you and see if it’s a good fit for where you are and what you want in life.

At a minimum, I can point you to some near-term actions and resources to find freedom if coaching with me isn’t right for you now – no worries.  I have told lots of coaches no along the way, it’s cool.

Your Challenge Now:

In your journal complete this sentence: When I Grow Up….

Then,  apply for a lackluster to limitless energizer session with me – let’s see if it’s a good fit for your initial foray into freedom.

 

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Jennifer Murphy

I am a certified personal and executive coach ruthlessly focused on helping people live awesome lives.  I spent a large chunk of my life pursuing other people’s ideas of success and while those experiences were sublime in some cases, they weren’t the “more” I was seeking and I just never felt full. In 2011, I made the commitment to live life on my terms and everything changed. The life I love today was created.

I am founder of No Limits Life Empowerment Institute as well as a working glass artist, Reiki Master,  Partner in Shaman Grocer in Iowa City, and Co-founder of the Midwest Reiki Festival.    My favorite time is spent doing anything soccer related with my aspiring world cup soccer player, 10 year old Alexander.  I am also a pretty big fan of gaming (PS4) with my partner Craig while solving the world’s social problems.  email me at jennifer@nolimitslife.guru and share your story.

 

The Complaint I hear Most

The single most common complaint I hear is:      

“I feel like all I do is work”

Or the family person version:

“All I do is work and do things with the family”

What they are really saying is they feel less than fulfilled.  They feel there is more out there.  They feel bored and want more.

Many aren’t sure what they’d do if they could do anything else.  Some have a clear picture of exactly what they’d do.

In both cases, as soon as the possibility of more is approached, resistance flies up like a barricade at a court house parking entry.

Basically, we aren’t happy with what is happening, but when the chance to change pops up, we feel like we can’t.  Pretty messed up right?

About a year ago, I was talking with a former colleague and she was sharing a dream of a business that embraced one of her passions.  As she spoke, she was glowing, literally glowing.  She had the whole idea mapped in her head and described it in such amazing detail that I could see it.  It is a gorgeous idea and she is perfect for it.

Tapping in to her excitement, I asked if she had thought about location.  She had and went on to describe it.

I pushed a little further and asked when.

The reasons why she couldn’t then came tumbling out: obligation to her mortgage, her corporate career, jeopardizing her retirement, her husband’s expectations and the belief that she just couldn’t.

This is a very common story.

The successful professional who wants more, but can’t seem to have it.  The more isn’t always a business idea.  Sometimes it is a desire to be able to sit down and relax at night – without the stress of work preying on them.  It is the desire for a life outside of work that is fun, filled with good friends and experiences that enrich their life, leaving them energized to go to a job they can love more fully since the rest of life is pretty awesome.

When I was hired at my last corporate job, one of the reasons I took the job was something my hiring manager said: “I believe in working to live, not living to work.” For as long as I worked for her, she lived by this.  She was supportive to her team in this philosophy in a corporate environment that didn’t always agree with her on that thought. Despite this awesome environment, I still found myself living to work.

In my years of working in large organizations, as a leader in the US Army and then again in corporate America, I observed three reasons we feel this “all I do is work” feeling:

  1. Society tells us this is the right thing to do, everyone else is so we follow along.
  2. We agree to focus on work temporarily for a big project or busy time then…it never ends and becomes routine.
  3. We never saw a different way: this was what our parents or mentors did, what we perceived was right and we followed the example of those we admired and loved.

 

All three impacted my life.  All three shaped the definition of success I pursued which was aligned primarily around a solid career.  If it enabled some cool stuff in the rest of my life that was great – I saw it as a bonus.

If this is you, you can shift this. 

One day I decided to listen to that calling from within asking for “more”.  Not knowing what “more” was for me, I engaged a life coach who helped me figure it out.  I moved away from living to work and having a life that had a successful career to living a successful life where I have a job I love. I feel the fullness of a lifestyle that supports my continued experience in this world – the experience I get to create anew each day.

How I shifted it:

  1. Engaging help – I got mine from a life coach, like me.
  2. Being open to possibilities and willing to change somethings in my life.
  3. Acknowledging that the life I was living wasn’t my dream life and taking the time to develop the picture of what I wanted.
  4. Taking immediate action to start living that life I wanted.
  5. Continuing to act, even when it was hard.

You can do this too. Are you ready to move beyond the complaint?

Start now.  If you need help, apply for my lackluster to limitless energizer session and we will spend an hour on your plan.

 

photo jun 20, 8 27 31 amHi, I am Jennifer Murphy.  I am a certified personal and executive coach ruthlessly focused on helping people live awesome lives – the ones that include work, but aren’t entirely work.  I spent a large chunk of my life pursuing other people’s ideas of success and while those experiences were sublime in some cases, they weren’t the “more” I was seeking and I just never felt full. In 2011, I made the commitment to live life on my terms and everything changed. The life I love today was created.

 

 

“I Know” is Not Enough

Life hasn’t been going well lately. You know it’s time for a change. You know that of all the changes you could make, one stands out above the rest.

You know what you’re supposed to do, right?

And there’s the problem.

The problem is that you already know what to do to maximize your happiness, increase your joy, and live in the power of purpose, and knowing and doing are two entirely different things. After all, there are goals to set, plans to make, and alternatives to consider, and all of it is quite overwhelming.

Or is it?

I’ve got two vitally important things for you to consider.

First, knowing isn’t everything. In fact, it’s NOTHING.

The biggest problem we have is telling ourselves that grand old lie, “I know.” When someone – a friend, coach, adviser, or trusted confidant – tells us what we would do well to do, we respond with, “I know.”

And we’re telling the truth. We really do know. Well…we think we know.

The truth is that knowing is not about what’s going on in your brain. It’s not even about what’s going on in your thoughts.

You see, knowing means that you are doing, pure and simple. If you are living the way you want to be living, then you know that way of life. If you’re not living it, then you don’t know it.

Simple, right?

So if you know what you’re supposed to do, why aren’t you doing it? What’s getting in the way?

That gets to the second point. The biggest obstacle to knowing is your own mind.

Your mind is a treasure trove of thoughts, experiences, judgments and ideas. Everything you have ever experienced, everything you have ever done, and everything you have ever accepted as true, are all stored in your mind. Some of these are wonderful and helpful, while others are less than desirable for your life.

And some of them are flat out wrong.

When was the last time you actually sorted out your thoughts, to see which ones are helping you, which ones are getting in the way, and which ones are total lies? It’s definitely something to consider!

Here’s a quick and enlightening exercise to try: 

Find a quiet place, and simply sit for ten minutes – that’s all! – and watch your thoughts. No phone, no computer, no interruptions. Just you and your thoughts. Notice what you are thinking. Notice where they came from…or who they came from. Then notice whether they are helpful are not

Then realize that you can actually choose to get rid of the thoughts you don’t want. You can actually delete thoughts that no longer serve you, and replace them with thoughts that actually help you become who you truly are (not who people have told you who you are).

Yes, it’s a complicated road. It does seem overwhelming. But it isn’t.

No, you can’t do it alone. This is your LIFE, not a do-it-yourself project.

We humans live in communities for a reason: no one can get through this life alone. We exist to help each other let go of what binds us, and live the best life possible, using our unique abilities and gifts.

Ask Jennifer, Denny, Kari, or even me for help, so that you can get rid of those total lies in your mind, get empowered, and start proving that you know the right direction in your life by actually living it. Follow this link to start the conversation.  

Taking Action with Kari Rossetti

So, did you do your homework?  If you didn’t catch my last blog, no worries, I can do a quick recap so you can catch up!  I asked my readers to write down a list of ALL the dreams you have for your life right now.  Then think about dreams you’ve let go or stopped even considering them from happening.  Lastly, prioritize them.  Some of them may still be on you “that’s-no-longer-a-dream” list for a reason, so it can stay there.  Try to get at least your top 5 dreams, but even just 1 will work wonderfully for this next part.

This month is all about ACTION.

Before we run full speed ahead, allow me to remind you of how to achieve any goal…

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One step at a time.

 

I will be the first to admit, my name is Kari and I’m a list-aholoic.  (Crowd responds in a low mumble, “Hi, Kari.”)  I make a list of ever task and “to-do” I want to get done.  Sometimes the list gives me anxiety and I get overwhelmed just looking at it so I cope by dishing up a big bowl of ice cream and watching an unproductive show on Netflix.  *NOTE: This is NOT an effective method to achieving…well, anything.  Unless your goal is to catch up on your favorite series.  Then, CONGRATULATIONS on achieving your goal!!

But I’m going to guess that is probably NOT your goal.

So let’s refocus.  My list-making, and maybe yours, can cause anxiety, but generally the intention is to visual how you’re going to make it happen.  And again, say it with me, one step at a time.  You may have to repeat this to yourself dozens or hundreds of times while working toward achieving your goal.  I know I do…and it truly helps!

Take a look at what you’ve identified as your tippity-top goal.  Look at the goal and really reflect on how it will feel to achieve that goal.  Visualize where you might be, who you might be with.

Now, bring yourself back into this moment, right now.  Look at the goal again.  Write down 3 actions you can take this week and realistically accomplish that move you closer to your goal.  Only you know what you are already committed to this week, so take into consideration those commitments.  Look at your calendar and set aside intentional time you will dedicate to this goal and to your achievement of these action steps.

How do those actions you’ve set for yourself make you feel?  Do they feel like BIG goals or not-big-enough goals?  If you feel comfortable sharing them with someone, go for it!  Ask for support from a close friend or family member.  And remember, I am always here to support you too!

Until next month, good luck!  And wishing you many blessings♥

KariKari Rossetti is a Life Coach specializing in Career Exploration, Empowerment and Freedom.  She has been developing her skills informally over the past 5 years and recently discovered her calling to practice these natural skills professionally while challenging herself to grow and be the best coach she can.  She is obtaining her Professional Coaching Certificate in Personal and Executive Coaching in December 2017 from the Coaching and Positive Psychology Institute.  In her spare time she loves being in nature and playing with her family. She can’t wait to support you on your journey to freedom.

 

Are you Too Busy For Time Management?

This week my son is in a 7 hour a day week-long soccer camp followed by a chiropractor session, a haircut, competitive club soccer tryout and bookended by soccer tournaments.

It’s a busy week for him.

It’s also prime training time for time management.

He’s 10 and life won’t slow down from here.  Increasingly, demands will be placed on his time as he gets more social, craves more mobility, plays in middle school and high school sports in addition to his club and continues with his hunting and fishing seasons.  Eventually (I shudder) he will have a girlfriend and she’ll want his time (she had better be good enough for him!).  Life will get busier and as his parent it’s up to me to model for him the best way to manage those demands.

It’s the kind of thing we didn’t really talk about when I was his age, nobody did.  I don’t remember people glorifying busy the same way – triple and double booked and racing all over hell and back to make it to every graduation, birthday, sport and event.  People said no to the things that weren’t most important.  That is the model I had.  Rather than just talking about it, I crave modeling and living with a time management model that is simply…simple. 

Back to my question: are you too busy for time management?

A few other versions of the question:

Are you too busy to focus on what is most important?

Why are you spending time on things that are not important to you?

Is there a reason your kids needs to play 4 sports?

Do you truly want to sacrifice your personal time and experience in this life to live vicariously through your kids, your friends or people online?

If I gave you 30 seconds, a minute even, could you list the 3-5 most important areas of your life and what you are doing to enrich them?

Are you investing in things instead of experiences?

These are the kinds of questions I had to ask myself almost a decade ago when I wanted to unscrew how screwed up my life had become.  They were hard to answer – despite the model I had growing up.  I had to spend some time working with a coach to pull away all the objections, forms of resistance and utter BS I had chosen to pile up around me.

If you struggle to answer those questions, you are in need of some serious overhaul in the way you manage your time.  Time is a finite resource – we get 24 hours in a day, we get this one life to live (in this incarnation), and we deserve to treat ourselves well in how we use it.  Not just well…outstandingly amazing.  We deserve to treat ourselves outstandingly amazing.

Three things you can do right now in 5 minutes or less to start treating ourselves outstandingly amazing:

  1. Optimize the next 7 days. Spend 5 minutes looking at your commitments for the next 7 days.  Say no to the things that are energy draining and unnecessary.  Send the card instead of going to the graduation party of the neighbor kid you say hi to once a year.  Say yes to the things that move you forward in life.
  2. Admit you can only be in one place at one time. Take a deep breath and recognize that you are only one being.  You can only be in one location at one time.  It isn’t your job to stress yourself out completely to make everyone else happy.  If you choose to over commit, do it because it feels fun – not because you want to have a heart attack in the next 12 months and die from stress.  Pick the event, activity or commitment that moves you forward and delegate, decline or defer the rest.  FYI – I just postponed a massage so that I could focus on getting some work churned through so when I do get that massage, I am not freaking out about my to-do list.
  3. Schedule 15 minutes once a week to optimize your schedule. Right now, set a weekly appointment with yourself to spend 15 minutes a week optimizing the next month or so.  It will always be a state of refinement, that 15 minutes will yield huge gains.

Yep, I get it, managing all the moving pieces of life is tough.  Part of loving the life you are living is loving what you are doing in it.  Those things are your choice.  You can choose to be too busy for time management and just keep letting life happen to you. 

OOOOORRRRRR
You can take charge now, implement a couple of simple things and let me know how they work for you. 

If you struggle, it may be time to bring in the big guns of life coaching and together we will look at what drives you to insanity and help you conquer that chaos and chart a fresh course full of purpose and straight up fun.  Start here if this is you.

We have a mini-course on this coming up in August, then again in September.  It will kick off on August 1 at 11am CST and run for 4 weeks then again on September 12 at 730pm and run for 4 weeks.

Right now I am looking for input on this course and would love to have you weigh in via this short survey – can you do that? It’s only 8 questions and I have a bonus for those of you interested in taking this to the next step.

Click here to be an Influencer and provide us your thoughts on the best focus areas for the “Too Busy To Take It Time Management Mini Course”.

 

j36Jennifer Murphy is a life coach, help captive in Iowa, but willing to stay because her son anchors her in place and he is so totally worth it!  An expert in helping people across the globe prioritize their values and create a life centered on what they value most, allowing them to shed stress, overwhelm and the BS that can suck the soul from daily living.  Learn more at http://www.nolimitslife.guru