Get a Clue! 3 ways to gain insight to your “More”

You want more out of life?

What is that more?

Don’t know?

Guess what? You are not alone.

Of all the reasons people seek my services, this vies for first place with those seeking business advice and services.

I partner with people to define the “more” they are seeking

and create the path make it real.

Let me demystify this a little for you; because it isn’t as hard as you might think, or as hard as you can make it.  Trust me, I know how to make things super hard.  I am good at complicating things.  If there were a kingdom called “making shite hard when it doesn’t have to be” I’d be The Queen.

Bumps and bruises earned along the way have served to convert me to the strong advocate for simplicity I am today.  Life doesn’t have to be so blessedly hard, answering the big questions need not require you to jump through a shed load of hoops and twirls.

Here are 5 ways to push through your own constructs of “can’t figure out my more” to “oh….there are some clues!”

  1. Levels of Fulfillment. Think about your life.  When do you feel most fulfilled?  Is it when you are helping someone?  What aspect of that in particular?

Example:  I found myself most fulfilled when I got to have conversations with people that resulted in specific action for them to take to better whatever dilemma they found themselves in.   Empty gripe sessions were not fun for me, they left me drained.  I didn’t want to just listen.  And I didn’t want to let anyone go without an action to take to move forward with whatever they were struggling with.

Think of your life and get specific – when, where, how do you feel most fulfilled?

  1. What did you want to do when you were 5? Or 10? Or 15? Clues can reside in our childhood. What called us when we were younger and less jaded by “expectation” or “reality” or limiting beliefs? What did we want before the programming consumed us?

Example: At age 8 my son wants to be “an Army, a soccer player and a police”  His energy is craving the variety, the not being confined, the being active energy that these roles represent to him.  He also has a strong sense of justice and team behavior.  As he ages, the “what” this manifests into may change, but I can see the energies remaining and maturing into what he does with his life.

Go back to those childhood dreams – what energies were you connecting to?

  1. I wish I could…statements. Create a series of “I wish I could….” Then fill in the blanks. You don’t HAVE TO do them, but if you let your imagination and your inner guru guide you in these, you may find that you surprise yourself.

Example:

I wish I could write a book.

I wish I could work out every day.

I wish I could connect people with their purpose.

I wish I could get people to see how to just be who they want to be.

And so on.

Create an entry in your journal, set a timer for at least 5 minutes and create a series of I wish I could statements.  Be open to what flows out, no judging, just writing!  

Those three are decent ways to get started on shaking out some clues to your “what is my more?” answers. To go further, claim your free Confusion to Clarity Strategy Session with me and let’s explore more ways to discover your more.

Jennifer Murphy is a life coach, glass artist, creator of The Art of Living Dangerously.  Learn more at http://www.nolimitslife.guru

It’s not a Someday Kind of Thing

When you place things on a someday list, kiss them good bye.  Someday has such vague energy it is impossible to pin down and so it won’t get fed.  It won’t get fed by you and it won’t get fed by anyone you might receive from. You didn’t invest in it.  And when you don’t invest, the universe won’t either.

Ever have moments of throwing caution to the wind? The “Oh screw it, let’s do it!” kind of moments when you power through your fear like a boss and capture the energy of the moment and do something that excites you.

I am a big fan of those moments, those moments of adrenaline and joy and excitement and a little thrill of “yes please!”.

Watch for them.

Life is not a someday kind of thing.

It is a live it now while you have this moment kind of thing.

Live it now, live it dangerously.

Learn the Art of Living Dangerously.

Jennifer Murphy, Art of Living Dangerously embraces the now through her work as a coach, artist, writer and single mom.  You can learn more at http://www.nolimitslife.guru 

13 Declarations of Independence

stone.tifAs Americans we use the word independence with abandon, it sits at the very heart of our existence. It is on our currency, we have an official declaration of it – we view it as a basic right. It is woven into to the fabric of our daily existence.

It’s cool and it never goes out of style.

In March I began what is to be the final tele-class of one of my teachers; she is being called to offer her services more locally than over the phone and declared her independence by following that guidance.  So I jumped at the opportunity to participate.  We are asked to declare our intentions  for the time we will spend in the class early on and I was as surprised as any when the words, “I am looking to become more independent” came out when I was called to share.

I wasn’t exactly sure what I meant by that, mostly because I have been pretty good at making my own decisions and deciding what works and what doesn’t in my life. But I have also experienced it as a double edge sword: sometimes alienating and sometimes empowering.

As we have gone through the course, opportunities to explore independence have come up.  Yet, it was just this morning where I connected with spirit and thoughts truly flowed.  What I learned was that it was time to get crystal clear on what it meant to be independent instead of simply being pushed and pulled by whatever felt good in the moment, as is my tendency.

From that sprung the 13 declarations of independence for my life. Perhaps a few will make sense to you and you can adopt – or create your own list of declarations:

  1. Independence means wanting but not needing.
  2. Independence means loving but not clinging.
  3. Independence means knowing I am amazing as me and amazing as we.
  4. Independence is not just plenty, but full.
  5. Independence is never feeling alone in the crowded room.
  6. Independence means knowing I can and still enjoying help.
  7. Independence is seeing how help is a multiplier, not a weakness.
  8. Independence is doing it my way as a plan, not a rebellion.
  9. Independence means knowing who to surround myself with and who to keep at a distance.
  10. Independence is caring for others only as much as I care for myself.
  11. Independence is creating new experiences, not collecting things.
  12. Independence means knowing who I am, unconcerned with what others perceive me to be.
  13. Independence is trusting infinite spirit more than finite self.

Independence is more than simply an idea up on a shelf; independence is an action we must take every day. There is very little passive energy in independence.  Independence requires maintenance and attention and attendance.  If we are complacent, independence become co-dependence, we place our fate in someone else’s hands, and let them decide. We lose who we are.

What action do you need to take today to claim your independence, to be who you really truly are in your authentic energy?

Jennifer Murphy is the universe’s premier advocate of The Art of Living Dangerously. A lifestyle she personifies in her partnering with coaching clients, her work as a glass artist writer and single parenting her amazing soccer playing son. Learn more at http://www.nolimitslife.guru 

3 Ways to Use Numerology in your Business (and Life!)

Numbers are literally everywhere we look.  Ages ago Pythagoras developed the idea that of numbers as symbols and tied them to predictable cycles (read more here).  Eventually, this progressed to tying energetic vibrations to the cycles and as we fast forward to today there are 478,000 hits for numerology calculator on google.  At any time during any day you can try one of these tools and get insight into the numbers in your life.

Numerology was a pretty normal part of life for me as a kid.  I recall people around me spouting off life path numbers upon learning of births, asking each other birth dates and then discussing the meaning.   It was just part of normal conversation.  I had no pull to learn more or less at the time.

A few years ago, I had opportunity to take a teleclass on numerology from a colleague and went for it.  I knew there was more to this stuff and wanted to know what it was.

I just kept diving deeper and today have what I would call a basic working knowledge.  I am not an expert and when people want really in depth work, I send them to my colleague Don Marlette who is amazing and can take your numbers and work his magic to provide you amazing insight via a private reading. Mostly I just do simple readings for clients and do the occasional psychic fair to share some new insight and experience with seekers.

On a personal level I use it a lot.  I look at key relationships in my life, I check dates, analyze addresses and phone numbers, and check locations.  But there are three simple ways you can use it in your business to see if the energy is supporting what you’d like it to be.

  1. Your Business Name.

As I was forming my business, I decided to check the name through the numerology lens.  My first business name was Life’s Adventures and it worked out to a 9 which was about high spiritual vibration and helping humanity.  A big mission and not exactly the heights I wanted to go to, but it helped propel me forward.

It led me to the next naming of No Limits Life coaching which is a 5 in numerology and a direct match to my life path number (the energy I am most fulfilled living) .  The 5 energy is about adventure and fun and passion and being in love with life and all it has to offer.  This is the energy of not settling. The exact energy I want to share with clients.

I will often shorten it to No Limits Life when I am encompassing the other areas of what I do in glass work and writing and that is an 8 which is about being the executive, creating financial prosperity and being in charge of my destiny.  Again, attributes I want to help people find the courage to embody.

To find the number for your name, use this link to find the numbers which correlate to each letter in your business name and then reduce it to one – so if you end up with a 64 once you add them all up, you add the 6 and 4 and get 10, then add the 1 and 0 and get a 1.  You can then look up the meaning of 1 on this link, or you can order the book “Glynis Has Your Number”by Glynis McCants and keep it as a handy reference for lots of things on the numerology front.

Do this whether you have a business, or are thinking about the name for one.  It can be very helpful in setting the right tone.

2. Dates for Events

Numbers have challenging energy and supportive energy relative to each other.  If you plan an event on a day that the numbers challenge each other, you might find it harder to be successful depending on where the challenge is in the numbers.

Each year has a number, each month, each day – how do they mesh with your business’s name or event name?  I like to check it out and see.

The process is the same as calculating the business name, simply add them up and compare.  Again, I recommend this book by Glynis McCants for reference because of its ease in explanation and comprehensiveness.

I did this when planning an event last year and can say I am glad I did it on the day I did.  I checked it out by the numbers as I was planning and there was compatibility.  Moving it around a day or two could have shifted energies positively or negatively, but on the whole, it went well and I believe it was in part because the energies supported it.

Again, this isn’t just for businesses!  You can use it for personal events as well.

  1. Personal Compatibility

I referred to this a little bit in the naming section, but it is important you don’t choose things in your business that are incompatible or in conflict with what you want to have happen: location, naming, phone numbers, office or studio mates, profession or whatever tools you use.

For example, in choosing my phone number for my business, (319-775-0509), I wanted to have both a 5 and 9 in it.  The whole number adds up to 9, the number of being of service to the world around me.

Another example, both the building and street number and the suite number my studio is in add up to 6.  The 6 is the number of nurturing and supporting family, home and self.  I do this as a large part of my work as a coach and I believe this energy supports my work.

These are just three areas that numerology can provide insight.  When I take a look at things through the numerology lens I usually find confirmation of my experience, insight into something that is puzzling me or help with pushing me one way or another on something.  I do encourage you to grab the resource I mentioned and see what you come up with!

Have you used numerology in your work or personal life before?  What has your experience been?

Jennifer Murphy is passionate about helping people see the more in life – their own special version of purpose and calling.  She cultivate courage through her work in teaching the Art of Living Dangerously and partners with people interested in making small shifts for big impacts in their life. You can learn more at www.nolimitslife.guru

On The Brink: a tale of passion and perseverance?

A business isn’t really a business if it doesn’t have customers, followers, the ability to support itself and growth right?  It can be kind of confusing for an entrepreneur when one of these links in the chain just isn’t staying put.

The entrepreneur can see that there is a following, there are a modest amount of customers, a scraping by with the supporting itself, yet growth is stagnant, if not falling back on itself at times.

Or the following is there, but the buying behavior isn’t strong.  Or expenses raise to that level just beyond reach for one reason or another – an egotistical sub-lease holder deciding he isn’t going to pay his third of the rent anymore and setting expectations he has no right to set or some other event.

Being an entrepreneur on the brink of making it is one of the more frustrating/exhilarating experiences of my life. This perspective come from me as a woman who has spent two deployments overseas working in combat conditions and a US embassy, had a premature child and been divorced twice.  Yes, this point in my business has me pulling my hair out.

What I don’t need is another business coach, I don’t need another “secret to making big bucks through xxx” and I don’t need to attend any more free events/webinars/teleconferences or whatever out there.

So what do I need?  What does any entrepreneur need in a moment like this?

She needs Courage: huge buckets of courage and clarity and encouragement and support from key people.

I have been asking the universe, my coaches, my partner, and my tattoo of Ganesh the mighty lord of obstacles and success to support me in all of these pursuits.  I am asking for the path on which to take action.  As I balance precariously at this point, do I cut my losses and get a corporate job again for a while or do I keep pushing through knowing that all the accumulated wisdom is paying off and the actions I am consistently taking are leading me to the other side?

There have been boom months, and bust months as I have been in business for the last few years.  There have been times I have no idea which direction I am going and what my message is as I go there.  And there are times like now when I know beyond a shadow that I have found my central message with The Art of Living Dangerously – building a life that you want, not some crazy version of expectation from others.  I want to partner with people to release that same tension I feel now – that there is more for you, this life you have is meant to be lived with purpose, not with programming.  You don’t have to settle.

This energy of not settling is why I feel so hypocritical in wondering if I should return to the corporate arena.  I am not passionate about the corporate arena. I am good at it and it was fun at times and not worthless. But honestly, I’d prefer to work in a coffee shop for a few hours a week, a few days a week while nurturing this business of mine.

If I am going to be ruthlessly honest, it physically hurts to consider going to work for someone else again – I want to be the coffee shop owner.  I want to be the one who hires someone like me who just wants those few hours.  When I left my corporate job I swore I’d never give up. I don’t fail and I don’t quit.  My enlisted often referred to me as a bulldog (no reference to my alma mater at Fresno State) or the little engine that could.  I am tenacious and I am passionate. Working for someone else subordinates that spirit in a big way and eventually I rebel in one way or another.

This video, despite it’s terrible quality, is a pretty accurate depiction of what is happening in my brain with respect to my pursuit of entrepreneurship right now.  Enjoy.

So what is a girl with a passion, a business on the brink and a child to support to do?

The answer to that remains to be seen.  I am open to whatever possibility shows up.  What I know for sure is that I will keep doing this on my terms and my terms alone.  No one else’s “formula for success” will be the key.  There is no “overnight success” in this deal, there is hard work and being authentic with the desire to truly serve others with the gift of freedom.

I know there are enough of you out there feeling the pull to take action to truly move your life the direction you feel called to, and I know you know that you could use some unbiased support. You are smart enough to recognize that your family loves you and means well but will always want what they believe is best for you. You are perceptive enough to see that an impartial, supportive, been there ally is worth investing in for your next move – to help you stay strong when you are not sure, when you are on the brink.

I have had these coaches, and they are why I haven’t thrown in the towel. They are a huge factor in why I have been able to be afraid and take action anyway. I will keep opening up for more courage, for more possibility – will you?

Do me a favor, if you are bored with your current life, if you are curious about opening up to more courage, to exploring the direction your life is going, to understanding how to overcome the obstacles of today, grab a confusion to clarity strategy session with me and let me offer you some small actions you can take to pave the way for whatever big impact you want to make in life.  You have been following me for a bit, we should chat.

I am not going to try to sell you anything I don’t think would help you – but if I see something, I will feel obligated to share a way out of it for you – it’s just my nature to want to help you find the way that is best for you! But I won’t be crazy salesy, I can’t, it isn’t me.  If it is for you, it is.  If it isn’t – no big. Trust me, you have nothing to lose, and I’d bet you gain something.

I am Jennifer Murphy, and I am all about partnering with people to ignite the courage they need to have to be whatever they want to be. Learn more on my website http://www.nolimitslife.guru

Are You a Foolish Prophet?

Sitting at the coffee house one morning, I overheard one of the more disturbing beliefs out there in the universe voiced.  “If you want to go to the poorhouse buy foods that are NOT genetically modified and good for you.”

My mouth dropped, my stomach clenched and I couldn’t help but turn and look at the person who said this.  He was advocating buying complete crap for food. He then went on to enjoy his own rhetoric with unsolicited observations about the world including such brilliance as how mean dogs are, how hard it is to get up in the morning so he rarely does it, how hard it is to be an adult and other stories before he announced he needed to go have another cigarette, again.

Experiences like these bring up a host of responses in me.

See, this man is representative of so many things I do not stand for that it is illuminating to see and hear this kind of behavior and be able to know that it isn’t for me and isn’t my choice to fall in with broad generalizations about life the way he does and act the foolish expert.

I prefer to live dangerously and form my own opinions based on my experiences. My experiences take me to places like:

  1. Being able to change my opinion based on an expanded experience bas2014-11-02 12.16.26e.

A few years ago I would have agreed that buying exclusively organic chemical free foods would break my bank.  Today I call BS on this idea.  I spend less at the co-op eating high quality foods because my body is satisfied sooner on high quality. My body wants good stuff so where I was spending an average of $200 a week on food a few years ago, today I spend an average of $60. I think there is a reason my son is ravenous when he comes back from time at his father’s and after one substantial meal at my house, he eats normally again.

  1. I allow there to be unique attributes within a group.

Women are not all needy, men are not all assholes (read why Men Freaking Rock here).  Kids aren’t dumb and all dogs of a certain breed are not bad.  But yeah, some women are needy, some men are assholes, some kids are dumb and there are a few bad owners out there who have created bad dogs within a breed. I totally get that. But I like to assess each individual on the merits of their own worth and make my own assessment.

  1. Being alive is freaking awesome – even when you get to be an adult.

2014-10-29 18.28.14Whether you are 8, 14, 40, or 90 being able to wake up every single day and engage in the adventure of the limitless possibilities in life is freaking awesome.  It just is.  There are totally tough experiences that pop up.  Yes, there are. Those things make us stronger and better and more interesting.  They give us stories and relatable energies that take us away from the same old rhetoric and allow for more fun and adventure to flow in.

  1. Smoking Cigarettes is stupid.

It is.  You know it is. You have read the report, you know it doesn’t make you look cool. I smoked when I drank for a while.  I smoked because it was one more way I could harm myself and get even with myself for not being good enough.  As an alcoholic that made perfect sense.  As an awakened being who wants to live a long, healthy, active, adventurous life – smoking is just stupid.

One of my favorite coaching questions is “who told you that?”  It can be super easy to just let words pour out of your mouth with very little thought and examination because that is just what you have always said, or what your programming embedded within.  When confronted with “who told you that?” in response to a potentially limiting belief, many will pause and not actually know where it came from.
So the next natural question to ask is “is it true?”  or “is that what you want to believe?”  We have the ability to make highly conscious decisions about what our beliefs are and what reality we want them to create.

I challenge you to live dangerously and get really conscious about what reality your thoughts are creating.  You don’t have to be the foolish expert or pompous prophet.

Be you, live dangerously, be you.

If this philosophy interests you, join me for my free series called The Art of Living Dangerously the last Monday of every month. In addition to the information and tools I will be sharing with you I will be interviewing those who chose that path of living dangerously and being their authentic selves and together we will learn how they did it and we can do even more of it too!

Jennifer Murphy Lives Dangerously each day as an artist, writer and partner to those who want to explore their own authenticity and explore the path of living dangerously. Learn more at www.nolimitslife.guru

5 Techniques Smart People Use to Say No

Ever wonder if there is a spring in your behind?  If you find yourself bouncing up from your literal or figurative chair every time there is an opportunity to say yes, sign up for something or be “the one” that does something, you just might.

The spring is not your friend if you find yourself chronically overbooked, overworked, too tired, not getting things done or otherwise not too pleased with all of your “yesses”.

Smart people learn to manage their spring and stop letting their spring manage them.

Smart people have control in their lives, are not chronically over whelmed and triple booked. Smart people can make time for the things they really want to do in life. 

Ready to be a smart person and say no when you need to? Good.  Here are 5 ways:

  1. Pause and let another spring in the rear say yes. This may seem manipulative, but try it.  Chances are there is another competitive spring butt type in the room just hoping they will beat you to the punch.  Let them.
  2. Check your schedule – Where would you fit what you are about to spring up and grab? Like an overfull shoe rack, you may have to give up one to fit another (gasp!). What will you have to give up and is it worth it?
  3. Know what you are saying yes to – you may not be the best person for the job. Just because it needs to be done, does not mean you are the best person to do it. The right person may be sitting in the crowd with the expertise or experience to get it done in half the time and, as hard as this may be to admit, better than you can.
  4. Is it exciting? Are you tingling in joy to tackle it? If you are dreading it, feeling disgruntled or even mad a having to say yes, you may need to learn to say no.
  5. Understand what is important to you and only say yes if it aligns to what is important. This is one I see clients struggle with a lot. It is easy to say yes to everything if everything is important.  But not everything is equally important is it?  Maybe you just haven’t taken the time to really think through that.

Understanding what is truly important, aligning life to those important values and activities and then living by that alignment is key to saying NO with empowered energy.  Saying no allows space for that just right person to learn their lesson or provide the needed service.

My Align Your Life Boot Camp is targeted at this very issue and helping you get to the foundation of what matters and live your life in a way that gets you to your authentic yes and authentic no on just about anything. To learn more, head to my website and look at upcoming events.

I encourage you to get smart, find your No and empower your life in a way that makes you and those around you stronger for it.

Jennifer Murphy is a life coach, artist and writer cultivating courage and alignment through partnering with others.  Learn more at http://www.nolimitslife.guru