Holiday Hell – A Survival Guide

Yes, the holiday season is here.  Gift lists are starting (or getting longer!), the sales are on their way, and the hustle and bustle is just around the corner.  Stores are already bursting at the seams with holiday cheer, and the constant beeping of the credit card reader can be heard long into the night.

Wait.  Can we just skip this and get right to January?


No way.

You see, I think this is the best time of year for learning how to be totally present (no pun intended).  To be fully and completely present to yourself, others, and the world around you.  The chaos is instructive.

The other 10 months of the year are usually spent lying to ourselves that we’re calm, peaceful, collected, and connected.  We’ve read the books, done the 30-day meditation marathons, and felt what we believe to be real spiritual progress.

Then, when November and December roll around, it all flies apart.  We discover that we’re far from the Golden Gates of Nirvana, and much closer to the Flaming Doors of Neurosis.  We’re frazzled, frustrated, and stressed, longing for some moment of peace and calm.

So let’s be proactive and actually take some steps toward peaceful living right now, so that the holiday season can be at least a little less crazy and more calm, less traumatic and more tranquil.  Yes, it will take a little self-discipline and work, but what in life doesn’t require a little giving of ourselves?

At heart, I’m still a numerologist with a touch of OCD, so here is a list of five things you can do for yourself to make the holidays more pleasant for yourself and those close to you.




Photo by Dingseyu Lei via Unsplash


1. Meditate. Every. Single. Day. My friends and clients hear me say this over and over, and I will never stop saying it. If you’re not taking time to stop and sit in silence, you’re basically shooting yourself in the foot, spiritually speaking.  Take every day and actually sit in silence for at least 10 minutes.  Pay attention to your breathing.  When a thought comes by, an emotion bubbles up, or a memory pops in to say hello, gently return to the awareness of the breath again.

Now some people love to use apps to meditate.  Take some advice from a friend: if you’re going to use an app, use a timer.  That’s it.  Meditation is not about following words, images, and directed goals; it’s about sitting in real silence and confronting that False Self head-on without flinching.  When we meditate, we let go of illusion and embrace reality as it is right now in the present moment.  Don’t take the easy route with a nice-sounding recording.  Jump into silence.  If there are noises around you, remember that every noise is a little Buddha, helping you to stay with the silence.

Too busy?  Make some time anyway.  If you can’t make 10 minutes happen to meditate, how can you make 10 minutes for a heart-to-heart with the person you love, or 10 minutes of high-quality work, or even 10 minutes of good downtime that restores and renews you?  If you make time for silence, silence will make time for you.   Your time during the day will actually lengthen. Trust me.




Photo by Andrew Neel via Unsplash 


2.Get things done. Again, simple, but difficult at the same time. Last-minute shopping is at the heart of the retail world during the holiday season.  Granted, they put all the holiday decorations out at the beginning of October, but somehow, we don’t start shopping until December 20th.

Get your shopping and buying done now.  When you procrastinate, it’s not doing anyone any good.  You get stressed, you pass on that stress to others, and they feed it right back to you.  Is all that high blood pressure, temper flare-ups, and stressed relationships worth it?  Probably not the best example of holiday cheer!

Yes, I understand  there are sales you can wait for, but you are a smart shopper to begin with, and you know where the best deals already are!  You could also do what I do: I shop in February for Christmas presents.  Most of the time, I get my holiday shopping done in February and March, with my “rush time” in June and July.  Less stress.  Fewer crowds.  Cheaper prices.

If you are a chronic procrastinator, put off procrastination!  Decide to procrastinate after the holiday season, and decide to get everything done sooner than ever before.  Once the holiday season is over, you can go back to procrastinating again.

3. Daily reminders. It’s helpful to remember why you celebrate the holidays. If we



Photo by Deniz Altinidas via Unsplash


understand what we’re doing, and the kind of holiday experience we want to manifest, everything seems to fall into place much more easily.

Set up a special area in your bedroom or family room with special tokens and reminders of
why you celebrate the holidays in the first place.  As you begin your day, stop by that special place and just be there for a minute or two.

Think about how you want the holidays to feel.  How your relationships will be experienced.  The sounds and sights that inspire you during the holiday season.  Really see, hear, and feel these things.  Then get on with your day.

4. Post-holiday treat for yourself. After the holiday season is over, we usually feel exhausted, no matter how much we’ve prepared, pre-planned, and pre-bought.  We need some time to re-charge our batteries and restore our spirit.



Photo by Kimson Doan via Unsplash


Set up a spa day for yourself.  Go to a special restaurant and movie/play with that special someone. Set up a party with friends, so you can laugh and relax.  Whatever you choose, set it up now, before the season begins. Then you will be assured of some proper relaxation and restoration after the holiday season ends.

5. Holiday shopping by the Numbers. 



Photo by Austris Augusts via Unsplash 


Okay, I wasn’t going to write this last one, but I got the “pull” that someone was needing this.  Here’s a quick holiday shopping guide if you’re stuck on what to buy someone for the holidays.


There are two ways you can use this.  If you know their Life Path number (the total of the person’s month, day and four-digit year of birth, added together until you get a single digit), then use that number.  If you only have their name, go with the first vowel of their first name (A=1, E=5, I=9, O=6, U=3).

  1. Practical items. Tools, utensils, earrings, sunglasses. Electronics are a plus.
  2. Cameras, framed pictures or photos, scrapbook, handmade gifts, candlelight dinner for two..
  3. Artistic and personalized items. Arts/crafts items, stained glass, special books. Sports equipment.
  4. Sports equipment, bath oils, perfumes/colognes, music, manicure, spa gift certificate.
  5. Diaries, calendars, calligraphy pens . Books and DVDs. Telephone accessories.
  6. Home decorations, music, jewelry, essential oils. Anything made of copper.
  7. Electronic gadgets, movie tickets/gift cards, spirituality books/recordings. Anything unique/unusual.
  8. Autobiographies, antiques. Something classy and/or historical.
  9. Travel items, gym memberships, exercise items, exotic gifts or travel destinations. First-aid kit.



Don Marlette is, among many other things, a member of the No Limits Life team.  His unique blend of psychic insight, mediumship and practical wisdom guide spiritual practitioners and everyday people through the perils of everyday getting by to build lives that feel like they are singing their heartsong.  Learn more at


What Is Your Visionary Type?

by Don Marlette DonMarlette(558x800)

The word “visionary” conjures up a number of images in my mind’s eye: the guru on the mountain top who attracts followers of all stripes, the leader with a mystical look in her eyes who cares more about practical change and less about what people think of her, the rebel who charges ahead, undaunted by opposition on every side – and these are but a few!

At some level, we are all visionaries.  Remember the first time that you thought about who you wanted to be when you grew up.  Recall the last time you could see yourself in a serious relationship with someone.  These are examples of many “visionary moments” we experience.  When we allow certain visionary moments to grow and develop into a consuming passion, we pass into the realm of the visionary lifestyle.

How that visionary lifestyle will look depends upon you.  I have found numerology to be a helpful tool to discover one’s “visionary type” or mode of visionary life.  Once you know your Visionary Type, you can discover your strengths and areas for growth, so that you can live a visionary lifestyle that is in harmony with your highest self.

To discover your own Visionary Type, simply write down the numerical month and day of your birth in the spaces below.  Then add them together, and keep adding the individual numbers together until you get a single number.  For example, if I were born on August 18, (which becomes 08-18), I would write:

0 + 8 + 1 + 8  =  17  and then…  1 + 7  = 8  = Visionary Type

Now it’s your turn:

__+___+___+___  = _____   and then…  ___+___  =  ___  =  Your Visionary Type

Now that you’ve found your Visionary Type number, match it to the corresponding description below to discover more about your type!

  1. The Reforming Visionary. Your idealism is key to living out your vision.  You have very high standards, and want to be a person of integrity in living them each day.  While maintaining a fierce loyalty to your vision, you may have problems with resentment and patience.  Stay in the moment and avoid becoming consumed by self-criticism or criticism of others.
  1. The Helping Visionary. Your ease of expressing your true feelings, unconditional love for others, and ability to connect with others will help you to bring your vision into reality. Living out your vision may be challenging at times, due to a tendency toward becoming sentimental and overly concerned with the opinions of others.  Become more emotionally aware and self-nurturing to more effectively make your vision a reality.
  1. The Results Visionary. Your ability to pull people into your circle of friends will take you far. You can be very driven toward success, and work very hard to be productive and effective in everything you do.  Watch out for workaholism and egotism, as you may easily tilt toward burnout or over-concern about your image.  Work on becoming more self-accepting and authentic in your relationship with yourself, as well in your relationships with others.  A balanced life will help you achieve your vision more effectively than overwork and “burning the midnight oil.”
  1. The Independent Visionary. Your independence stems from your desire to be more reserved and alone. Solitude is your greatest teacher, as well as the wellspring of your own dynamic creativity.  Be careful of falling into self-pity or personal drama; your life is actually better than you may perceive it right now.  Good social interactions will help you gain perspective.  Strive to become more objective and principled so that you can see your true progress in achieving your goals.  You are doing better than you think!
  1. The Cerebral Visionary. Your constant curiosity, alertness to information, and innovative approaches help you on your path. Your pioneering spirit helps you blaze new trails in making your vision a reality.  Because you are very much “in your head”, you may tend toward becoming more isolated and eccentric than you would like.  Develop greater self-confidence and decisiveness, so that you don’t become trapped into thinking you have to do everything.
  1. The Responsible Visionary. You don’t really see yourself as the visionary type! You want to be secure in what you do, so striking out into the unknown is more than a little scary.  However, you do have a rebellious streak in you, and that rebelliousness is the hatchery of your true visionary creativity.  Get in touch with that, and courageously champion that vision with all your might.  Yes, letting go of security can be frightening, but life will become much richer for you when you do.
  1. The Playful Visionary. Your playfulness, spontaneous and optimistic nature will give you the fuel to achieve your goals. Beware of becoming too impulsive and off-task, however.  Once you make a decision, strive to follow through to its completion.  Also, get in touch with your own inner pain, as it will help you to become more authentic and reach more people effectively.
  1. The Challenging Visionary. Your strong self-confidence helps you to forge ahead and get things done, especially in making your vision a reality. Although your assertiveness can help you accomplish great things, be mindful that you do not become intimidating or controlling.  Use your strengths to become more inspiring for others and improve their lives.
  1. The Self-Effacing Visionary. Yes, you want to have a peaceful life and not trouble the waters too much, and there is a way to achieve your goals without stepping on too many toes. Realize that confrontation and occasional conflict are part of the work of manifesting your dreams, and your natural peacefulness and calm will make these confrontations less dramatic than you may fear.  Work on becoming more self-developing and self-confident to bring out the best in yourself for the good of others.

Keep in mind these Visionary Types are not set in stone.  They are intended to help you see your own strengths, and how you can incorporate them in to your life.  Your own unique “stamp” on your Visionary Type is not only important, but necessary for you to articulate, plan and implement a vision and goals that are truly your own.

Have fun adding this to your personal toolbox for making your dreams a reality!

Don Marlette is a powerful intuitive who loves to help people learn to sing their heart song! You can learn more about Don and how to work directly with him, take a class with him or attend his live event on April 2 by clicking here