Are you Too Busy For Time Management?

This week my son is in a 7 hour a day week-long soccer camp followed by a chiropractor session, a haircut, competitive club soccer tryout and bookended by soccer tournaments.

It’s a busy week for him.

It’s also prime training time for time management.

He’s 10 and life won’t slow down from here.  Increasingly, demands will be placed on his time as he gets more social, craves more mobility, plays in middle school and high school sports in addition to his club and continues with his hunting and fishing seasons.  Eventually (I shudder) he will have a girlfriend and she’ll want his time (she had better be good enough for him!).  Life will get busier and as his parent it’s up to me to model for him the best way to manage those demands.

It’s the kind of thing we didn’t really talk about when I was his age, nobody did.  I don’t remember people glorifying busy the same way – triple and double booked and racing all over hell and back to make it to every graduation, birthday, sport and event.  People said no to the things that weren’t most important.  That is the model I had.  Rather than just talking about it, I crave modeling and living with a time management model that is simply…simple. 

Back to my question: are you too busy for time management?

A few other versions of the question:

Are you too busy to focus on what is most important?

Why are you spending time on things that are not important to you?

Is there a reason your kids needs to play 4 sports?

Do you truly want to sacrifice your personal time and experience in this life to live vicariously through your kids, your friends or people online?

If I gave you 30 seconds, a minute even, could you list the 3-5 most important areas of your life and what you are doing to enrich them?

Are you investing in things instead of experiences?

These are the kinds of questions I had to ask myself almost a decade ago when I wanted to unscrew how screwed up my life had become.  They were hard to answer – despite the model I had growing up.  I had to spend some time working with a coach to pull away all the objections, forms of resistance and utter BS I had chosen to pile up around me.

If you struggle to answer those questions, you are in need of some serious overhaul in the way you manage your time.  Time is a finite resource – we get 24 hours in a day, we get this one life to live (in this incarnation), and we deserve to treat ourselves well in how we use it.  Not just well…outstandingly amazing.  We deserve to treat ourselves outstandingly amazing.

Three things you can do right now in 5 minutes or less to start treating ourselves outstandingly amazing:

  1. Optimize the next 7 days. Spend 5 minutes looking at your commitments for the next 7 days.  Say no to the things that are energy draining and unnecessary.  Send the card instead of going to the graduation party of the neighbor kid you say hi to once a year.  Say yes to the things that move you forward in life.
  2. Admit you can only be in one place at one time. Take a deep breath and recognize that you are only one being.  You can only be in one location at one time.  It isn’t your job to stress yourself out completely to make everyone else happy.  If you choose to over commit, do it because it feels fun – not because you want to have a heart attack in the next 12 months and die from stress.  Pick the event, activity or commitment that moves you forward and delegate, decline or defer the rest.  FYI – I just postponed a massage so that I could focus on getting some work churned through so when I do get that massage, I am not freaking out about my to-do list.
  3. Schedule 15 minutes once a week to optimize your schedule. Right now, set a weekly appointment with yourself to spend 15 minutes a week optimizing the next month or so.  It will always be a state of refinement, that 15 minutes will yield huge gains.

Yep, I get it, managing all the moving pieces of life is tough.  Part of loving the life you are living is loving what you are doing in it.  Those things are your choice.  You can choose to be too busy for time management and just keep letting life happen to you. 

OOOOORRRRRR
You can take charge now, implement a couple of simple things and let me know how they work for you. 

If you struggle, it may be time to bring in the big guns of life coaching and together we will look at what drives you to insanity and help you conquer that chaos and chart a fresh course full of purpose and straight up fun.  Start here if this is you.

We have a mini-course on this coming up in August, then again in September.  It will kick off on August 1 at 11am CST and run for 4 weeks then again on September 12 at 730pm and run for 4 weeks.

Right now I am looking for input on this course and would love to have you weigh in via this short survey – can you do that? It’s only 8 questions and I have a bonus for those of you interested in taking this to the next step.

Click here to be an Influencer and provide us your thoughts on the best focus areas for the “Too Busy To Take It Time Management Mini Course”.

 

j36Jennifer Murphy is a life coach, help captive in Iowa, but willing to stay because her son anchors her in place and he is so totally worth it!  An expert in helping people across the globe prioritize their values and create a life centered on what they value most, allowing them to shed stress, overwhelm and the BS that can suck the soul from daily living.  Learn more at http://www.nolimitslife.guru 

But It’s a GOOD Busy?!

What if you are super busy, love everything you are doing and want to give none of it up? 

You adore everything happening, it all feeds some part of you and you feel like a cat in a room full of mice wanting to chase every single thing and eat it up! Then, you find yourself panting in the corner smiling, but exhausted from the chase. Sometimes, overwhelm comes, not from having too many bad things but, from having so much good it gets super hard to identify the source of discontent.

“It all feels good, what do I have to complain about?”

Perhaps you start to fall behind in one area, or (maybe AND) another …you know you are and get even more frustrated because “why aren’t I on top of all these things I love to do?”  You wonder why it isn’t easy and natural to feel blessed, blissed out and in balance with all the bounty spirit intended, then provided for you.

‘Cause it’s BS. This idea that because it’s all “good” that you won’t feel stressed and crazy. 

It is one hundred percent possible to overwhelm yourself with the things you love.  Parents will get this.  We will do anything for our children.  Anything.  To include sitting through 2 hour soccer practices twice a week and driving all over a super boring state filled with cornfields to find soccer complexes in the middle of said cornfields for 8 weekends straight while working 6 different jobs to make sure you can pay for soccer club membership… it’s awesome.  We will do that and smile and say how blessed we are with athletic children and love to watch them, truly.  We will truly love it.

But oh my… getting a little time or budget for ourselves is the absolute best.

In you missed it: the point is that even the stuff you love can feel like too much sometimes.  I hear clients describe it like this:

“I am so busy!  None of it is bad stuff, I am just so busy and I feel so blessed, but I am tired!  And I feel guilty for wanting any of it to stop.”

Or

“Nothing going on is bad, it is just a lot.”

Either of those ring a bell? One or both might if you have taken any kind of action to say yes to some great things in your life.

Here is the great secret…ready for it?

Life doesn’t have to suck to want to make a change.

Life might be phenomenal by all accounts and your intuition is banging on your brain hollering that yes, in fact, some of this good has to give. I am not a big fan of setting limits (my business is called No Limits Life), but sometimes you start doing things because they seem like a good idea and they are pretty cool.  And they work for a while, until they don’t.

We live different chapters in life and things fit in one chapter, but not necessarily the next.  Sometimes we rebel against this idea and refuse to even consider the thought. “Perish!” we beg the thought, “Perish and be gone!  I am Superwoman (or man) and I can TOTALLY do it all because I love it!”

But all of these chapters have a beginning and an end for a reason and it is okay to let go when the story moves on.    In order to move past this “things are great but I am overwhelmed” energy to engage in the bigger energy of spirits intent for you, confront the fallacy of “I can’t be overwhelmed if it’s all good stuff.”

First, make a thorough list all the activities you are committed to. Then, ask yourself these three questions:

  1. If I were told I’d have 6 months to live, what am I doing now that I’d want to keep doing and where would I let go? (I know this may seem a little morbid, but try it)
  2. If I lost my job tomorrow, what would I absolutely have to maintain to keep my sanity intact?
  3. On a scale of 1 to 10, 1 being “eh, I’d be cool without it” and 10 being “I absolutely never want to give it up” how would you rate the activities you are committed to right now?

In the course of answering these questions, you may reveal that yeah…you do indeed have some good things going on.  But you don’t HAVE to have them going on.  It’s okay to let one or two or 6 go.

Go ahead, cut the cord and let it go, it will fly into the open heart and arms of the right person to be having that experience. You trust infinite spirit over your finite self, right?  Then trust that infinite energy to see it to its rightful home.  The things that remain in your space are yours to have and to file into the right chapter in your book of calling.

I am a certified expert in having way too many awesome things going on simultaneously.  I have been a banner carrier for the ideas of “I am busy, but it’s a good busy” and “I can’t possibly say no to anything because it’s all so great”. If I can quit overindulging in the name of “good stuff” so can you, and maybe just maybe you’ll find the great stuff.

If you want some help with this, let me know.  I’d love to guide you to clarity about your “more” in life and what it means to live life on your terms.  Click here to schedule a complimentary 30 minute session with me and discover the power of coaching.

Jennifer Murphy is passionate about living life to its fullest and partnering others to help them see that they can too.  You can learn more about her work as a coach, artist and more at www.nolimitslife.guru